To bring some humor back->

J-M v2.5.5 said:Wow good post retard, why don't you randomly make some more words italic while you continue to whine about stupid sh*t like you usually do?villager said:Wow, good job Docmombo, could of done that with one picture?
The 6th grade science teacher asked her class, which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?'
No one answered for a long time 'till little Mary stood up, angry, and said the teacher should not be asking 6th graders question like that. She was going to tell her parents, who would tell the principal who would fire the teacher.
The teacher ignored her and asked the question again, 'which body part increases to 10 times its size when stimulated?'
Finally Billy stood up and said that the body part that increases 10 times its size when stimulated is the pupil of the eye.
The teacher said 'very good, Billy,' then turned to Mary and said, 'As for you, young lady, I have three things to say:
You have a dirty mind,
You didn't read your homework, and
One day you will be very, very disappointed.
Mikkel said:
Mikkel said:
A first-grade teacher, Ms. Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"
Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"
Ms. Brooks had had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.
Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9."
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36."
And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.
The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rd grade."
Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions."
The principal and Harry both agreed.
Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Harry, after a moment: "Legs."
Ms. Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
The principal wondered why she would ask such a question!
Harry replied: "Pockets."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Harry: "Pants."
Ms. Brooks: What starts with a C, ends with a T, is hairy, oval, delicious and contains thin, whitish liquid?"
Harry: "Coconut."
The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.
Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer,
Harry replied, "Bubble gum."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?"
Harry: "Shake hands."
The principal was trembling.
Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?"
Harry: "Firetruck."
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last seven questions wrong...... "
My friend likes to read his two young sons fairy tales at night. Having a deep-rooted sense of humor, he often ad-libs parts of the stories for fun.
One day his youngest son was sitting in his first grade class as the teacher was reading the story of the Three Little Pigs. She came to the part of the story where the first pig was trying to acquire building materials for his home. She said '...And so the pig went up to the man with a wheelbarrow full of straw and said 'Pardon me sir, but might I have some of that straw to build my house with?''
Then the teacher asked the class 'And what do you think that man said?'
At that point my friend's son raised his hand and said 'I know! I know! He said 'Holy Shit!! A talking pig!''
The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.